Anger Therapist for Women in Shelby Township and Rochester Hills
Julie Lavin at Parc Family Therapy provides anger counseling for women near Rochester Hills and Shelby Township Michigan area. Read more below to see if you think that she can help you in your journey to more joy and less anger.
How do I know if I should see a therapist for my anger?
Do you find that you say things you later regret? Do you want something that you can’t seem to get or reach? Anger rarely spikes at a convenient time. You can’t focus because you’re fuming. You snap at people you care about. The hurtful words are out there and you want to so bad to take them back. I’ve been there and done that!
If you are not able to manage your anger, or if you find that those close to you steer clear of you lately because they are afraid of which version of you they’ll get, it maybe time to talk to someone. Or maybe you don’t explode but your anger is building inside your heart and you don’t know how to let it out without blowing a gasket.
What areas does anger impact?
Anger can feel all consuming at times or bubble out when you least expect it. Some areas that anger maybe impacting your life can include:
- Your friendships
- Your job performance
- Fights with your significant other
- Home for the holidays with mom and dad
- When you’re out running errands
- Your academic career
- What else?
Causes of anger in women
Lots of things can cause anger. At its most basic level, I tell women that anger surfaces when we have a blocked goal. We want something that we are desperately trying to get and we can’t. These blocked goals can include not meeting your goals in your relationships, in your career, or when life simply does not go the way we want it too. Before we know it we are throwing adult temper-tantrums. Not attractive, right?
Anger can also rear its ugly head when we when are sad, frustrated, stressed, or anxious just to name a few. Take heart, there is always a reason for our anger. Sometimes it might take a little digging to find out what that reason is and how to solve it.
If we met, how would you help me with my anger?
As I said above, anger comes when we have a blocked goal. So part of our time will be uncovering what is the goal that is blocked. What are you trying to get at that you just can’t seem to reach? Together we can figure out how to go about the goal another way, strategies to reduce the intense feelings of anger, or preventative strategies from keeping our anger temperature from rising so high and so quick in the first place.
Two starter tips to manage my anger
Pause.
When you find yourself getting more steamed than you would like, hit the pause button. Do whatever you have to do to lower your stress. Take a walk. Listen to music. Take a drive in your car to and scream (not that I’ve done that or anything ;-)) If you’re fighting with someone, tell them you need a few minutes to yourself and step out of the room. You know what cools you down the best.
Reflect.
Once the intensity of your anger has lowered, ask yourself, what is my goal here that I feel is being blocked? What do I want that I can’t seem to get? What can I do right now that IS in my control?
Anger is not just a male issue. We woman can get angry. It’s normal. But your anger doesn’t have to define you or your relationships. Let’s find other ways of dealing with life when you are steaming mad!